The Process of Love (Part 4): What Does Loving Them Entail?

TO START

This week, we jumped into part 4 of a series called The Process of Love, a series that invites us to come to terms with how to love those who are hard to love in our lives. Over this series, we will unpack 1st John in hopes of unpacking how we might receive and extend love to those who aren't always easy to love. 

  • What do you feel you might have to sacrifice or change in order to love someone who is hard to love? (think of a practical example)

TO DISCUSS

This week, we come to terms with the reality that we are either growing or slowly dying in our capacity to love. 

  • At this moment in your life, do you feel love becoming more present or absent in your life? Why? OR is there evidence in your life that the love of God is growing in you?

Read 1 John 3:11-18 together 

  • How do you deal with your anger towards people who you feel you have a right to hate? Do you find yourself stuck right now in cycles of hate or anger? If so, how can the love of Jesus alter this reality for you?

In the sermon, Zane mentioned our mode of operation is often, “I’m just trying to make it through the day”... it’s a part of the cultural psyche and it sounds a whole lot like a mode in which committing to others flourishing around you is not a part of the agenda. 

  • What area or areas of your life do you feel God might be opening you up to take action to contribute to the flourishing of others? What costs are you're willing to be burdened with for the sake of someone else's flourishing?

Near the end of the sermon Zane pointed us to the words of C.S. Lewis who writes, “It’s easier to be enthusiastic about Humanity with a capital ‘H’ than it is to love individual men and women, especially those who are uninteresting, exasperating, depraved, or otherwise unattractive. Loving everybody in general may be an excuse for loving nobody in particular?” 

  • Who might be the “them” in your life who is in need of life just like you need it? Who is frustrating or irritating to you but who you are called to love? (This is a contemplative question to close; no need to share but just reflect personally; consider the 4 questions Zane provided us with in bringing love to action) 

TO CLOSE

This week, we want to invite your group to pray for one another for courage to respond with love not just in speech or word but in action this week towards the person they thought of above… Invite 30-60 seconds of silence and for each person to think about how they can lay down their life for this person and then close with the following prayer: 

God, in Jesus Christ, You endured darkness and defeated it. 

Jesus, you endured suffering to the point of nails being driven into your hands.

You gave your body to us and your ways have been illuminated through practical, abiding acts of love.

Holy Spirit, we ask that you would illuminate love in our heads, 

through our hands, and through our bodies this week.

Enable us to lay down our lives for the “them” in our life this week. 

Matt DeLano